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Christian
Jokes!
This is our
funniest project at whatagod.com and a sure laugh every time! If you
love a good joke then you will definitely enjoy this website. We will
be selecting individual joke submissions each month for addition to
our website. If you're interested please fill out the form
or simply email us Jokes@whatagod.com!
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Joke:
This man was asking God some questions and he said "God what is
a million years to you"? A million years to you would be 1
second to me! "God what is 1 million dollars to you"? A
million dollars to you would would be 1 penny to me! "God
",the man said, "can i have a penny"? God said, in a second!
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Joke:
One day a man was walking along in a forest. All of a sudden a
gigantic bear came running out from the trees. The man became scared
and started running. He looked back only to see the bear gaining on
him. He summoned all of this strength and ran even faster. As he
looked back only to see the bear was on him, he tripped over a stone
and went falling. As he got up the bear pushed him to the floor.
"OH JESUS!" the man screamed. At that moment, everything
had stopped. The bear glared his teeth motionless, leaves had stopped
falling, even the river was still. A big flash of light consumed the
area. The man looked next to the bear and there stood Jesus. "For
many years you continue to not believe in me. You shut me out of
your life. And now, at this moment, you call upon me? There isn't
anything I can do for you. You are an Atheist."Jesus said.
"Well, could you atleast make the bear Christian?" The man
asked. And with this Jesus was gone and time was once again moving.
He looked up at the bear who's teeth were no longer showing. The bear
rested back onto his hind legs, and miraculously began to speak,
"Dear Lord, thank you for this meal which I am about to recieve..."
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Joke:
Billy's mom told him to get the broom outside at night time. He was
scared so his mom said don't be scared for God is all around you. So
billy opens the door and says God if your out there could ya hand me
the broom!
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Joke:
One day Mr. Bush got a chance to see Moses. The day he was with
Moses, Moses did not talk to Mr. Bush at all. Once Mr. Bush left,
someone came to Moses and said why did you not talk to him? Moses
said the last time I spoke to a bush I had to spend 40 years in the desert!
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Joke:
Jesus and Satin were having a computer typing contest. God was the
Judge of the Contest. All the sudden there is a flash of lightning.
The electricity goes off. The computers go off. Minutes later the
computers comes back on. All of Satins typing was lost and Jesuss'
was not. Satin said, "How did you do that"? Jesus responded
"Jesus Saves"!
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The New Pastor
The new pastor
was visiting in the homes of his
parishioners. At
one house it seemed obvious that someone
was at home, but
no answer came to his repeated knocks at
the door. He took
out a card, wrote "Revelation 3:20" on
the back and
stuck it in the door.
When the offering
was processed the following Sunday, he
found that his
card had been returned. Added to it was
this cryptic
message, "Genesis 3:10."
Reaching for his
Bible to check out the citation, he broke
up in gales of laughter.
Revelation 3:20
begins "Behold,
I stand at the door and
knock."
Genesis 3:10
reads, "I
heard your voice in the garden and
I was afraid
for I was naked."
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Joke:
A Sunday school teacher asked her children one day that whoever among
them that wants to go to heaven should raise their hand. All of them
raised their hands except a small boy, when his teacher asked him why
he didn't raise his hand, he said his mother instructed him not to go
anywhere after the Sunday school service.
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